Knowest Thine Enemy - Hell

• Hell is aplace full of fire, except for arsonists. Arsonist hell is full of flame retardant and Howie Long movies.
• While the expression is quite popular, the trip to Hell is only taken in a handbasket by owners of those annoying little yippie dogs.
• There is no Porkchop Day in Hell's cafeteria.
• Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Which, for most of us, is really a great relief.
• Etymologically, the word "hell" comes from from the Old English "helan" which meant "to conceal". See that, you learned something new today. Good for you.
• In hell one must live along side the other damned, whose outbursts of pain, grief and hatred are an ever-present source of fresh torment. My next door neighbor makes the hall reak of patchouli and plays Phish really loud.
• The road to hell is paved with unbought stuffed dogs. Not my fault.
• Some people question how a being of absolute love like the Lord could let souls suffer in a place of such horrific torment. To them I say: "Burn ,heretic, burn!!!!!"
• Christian Hell is pretty much just the flames...its alot less into the whole ironic punishment thing as Hades.
• If you die before Jimmy Carter and end up in hell, please be sure to save him a seat.
• Hell is full of demons and devils. There probably is some easy joke here about Martin Brodeur, but I am not one to go for easy jokes.
• Speaking of easy jokes, there are no Bahamians in Hell, they are all in Limbo!!!
• Hell is a place of unimaginable pain and torment that will last throughout all eternity. If given the choice between Hell and high water, take high water.
• In Paradise Lost, much of the pain of hell is derived from the absence of the presence of the Almighty. To put it in perspective, just think of how you felt when they canceled Small Wonder, but like 10 times worse.
• Hell is other people....so leave me the heck alone!!!